Seriously. I've been on hold for thirty minutes thirty hours three days. That's because the person that has me on hold is also on hold. That's what he told me yesterday. And I believe him. There's no one else to believe. He's the only one. I hope he comes back. Soon. Please. Please come back. There's this schizo background music. A Christmasy xylophone piece that alternates with a. . . Shit. It clicked off. Hello? Hello? All is lost. . .