Red Chuck

How to Pick the Right Color

Paint half the room one color. Decide you don't like the color. Drive west. Enter hardware superstore. Find paint department. Pick a seemingly tasteful color. Wait in line. Ask paint department team member to mix color you have selected. Wait. Observe mixed color. Realize you have to buy mixed color. Ask paint department team member if he can lighten the color. Wait. Observe result. Ask paint department team member if he can lighten the color again. Wait. Observe result. Begrudgingly agree to purchase quart of paint. Wait in line. Make purchase. Walk to car in the rain. Retrieve keys from pocket. Drop newly bought quart of paint. Watch paint fill plastic bag as it gushes from can. Observe color of drops that leak from plastic bag. Decide that that color is still too dark. Hand off bladder-like plastic sack to parking lot team member who offers to dispose of bag o' paint. Drive home. Decide the color you started with looks just great.