November 11, 2004
Dress Me Dog
This morning Auntie called at 6:30. "Can you come wake up a drunk guy that broke into my house last night?"
It seems a young neighbor got dropped off at the wrong house. He passed out on Auntie's deck. At 3:30am it started pouring rain. He broke into Auntie's house. Instead of calling the police, Auntie told him he could sleep downstairs. She locked herself upstairs and called me and Fred at dawn.
Drunk boy was way gone. It took me an hour to rouse him. Finally a spray bottle and an alarm clock got him up.
"Get dressed. Its time to go home," I said.
"Dress me, dog," he replied.
Finally drunk boy got himself dressed and I walked him a block to his house.
"Is this you?" I asked as we approached his residence.
"No," he slurred. "It is not my legal entity. It is the house where I live."
"Take care," I said and he let himself in.
Lucky guy. Most people would have called the cops or shot him. I think he picked the only house in Little Rock where he would be given a bed. Auntie even offered him a coke on his way out. Now that's southern hospitality.
Posted by Red Chuck at November 11, 2004 09:34 AM